How To Use Psychology To Get Over Someone Fast (So You Can Be Yourself Again)

Want to know how to fall out of love?
Want to know how to stop loving someone?
If you want to fall out of love with someone you can’t have, there are a number of psychology tricks which you can use to your advantage (I cover the full set in my book “The Erase Code.” In this article, I want to share with you one such trick which involves the use of what psychologists call classical conditioning.
To begin, let’s make a comparison…
Getting over a breakup can be a lot like quitting smoking. When a person chooses to give up a habit like smoking, the initial few days is always the hardest to overcome. Fortunately it gets easier with time, patience, and practice.
One of the biggest problems with getting over a habit are the everyday circumstances and places that you associate with that habit. For instance, a smoker might strongly correlate:
• A type of food
• A certain time of day
• Or a specific place etc
…with smoking, meaning when he encounters these things, having a cigarette is the first thing that enters his mind. This naturally leads to a sense of discomfort, since smoking is no longer an option.
These types of feelings are analogous to that of someone who just went through a breakup. Lots of things right now will be causing you to remember your ex …constantly keeping your pain raw. Check out the following the video on YouTube from my program The Erase Code: How To Get Over Anyone In Less Than A Week Using Psychology. It details exactly how many different things can be in play in the pain you are feeling right now.
To Fall Out of Love, Destroy Your Associations
What we’re talking about here is called classical conditioning.
People usually make mental bonds between two experiences, associating one with the other. Certain situations or places can trigger an emotional response based on past incidents. Smokers who give up cigarettes encounter this all the time. If they’re used to having a smoke during certain breaks in their workday, they will inevitably associate those breaks with having a cigarette.
The same applies to breakups. When you relate a place with your ex (such as the local town park for example), you will find yourself thinking of them over and over again every time you pass the town park. And the problem is that the longer the relationship went on, the more of these associations (between your ex and certain things and places etc) will have been created.
How to Use Psychology to Fall Out Of Love With Them
Recognizing the symptoms of classical conditioning and learning how it works is key in finally being able to move on. Imagine your favourite movie you had as a child. Whenever you see this movie, you experience nostalgic feelings and happy memories. Now imagine watching this film over and over again for a hundred times. The pleasurable memories would diminish with each viewing, and eventually you would get sick of it.
The same can be done with past relationships. You need to rewire the existing associations you have of your ex and certain things/places etc …and place new associations in place where your ex currently is. For example, going back to our example of the town park – a good way to remove the association of your ex to the town park would be to create a new association with the town park. You could use the town park as your running track and use it to train for the local 5k or 10k in your area. Each time you go to the town park and try to beat your old record for running a 5k distance, your mind will begin to be programmed to associate the town park with running …rather than with your ex.
For each positive experience you connect to that once-painful place, the suffering declines. Your new, pleasant memories take its place and slowly you no longer make those identifications with your ex. Over time, you will begin to fall out of love as your mind sees less and less reasons to constantly think of them. It will begin to see that you are thinking less and less about them and so will interpret this to mean you have moved on.
If You Just Can’t Let Go, Here’s Why
For some people, getting over their heartbreak is much more difficult than for others. This is usually because they refuse to break their mental pattern and continue to relate everything back to the relationship that they lost. They ruminate over their ex and continue to think about and do all the things that remind them of their loved one. They don’t create those new connections that would help them be happy again. They wallow in their misery and refuse to pull themselves out of it.
Honoring and expressing your emotions is important, but you have to know the right time to let go. The more you brood over your suffering, the deeper you push it into your subconscious, making it harder to uproot when you’re finally ready to move on.
So, allow yourself to feel your pain, but move quickly to eradicate it. Resist the urge to deepen those associations that make you think of your ex, and you’ll be able to bounce back and move on much more quickly.
Everyone knows that breakups are distressing, but you shouldn’t allow yourself to get stuck in that mindset. Set your emotions free, and start making those fresh new associations as early as you can.
Parallel Universes: Theories & Evidence

Our universe may live in one bubble that is sitting in a network of bubble universes in space.
Is our universe unique? From science fiction to science fact, there is a proposal out there that suggests that there could be other universes besides our own, where all the choices you made in this life played out in alternate realities. So, instead of turning down that job offer that took you from the United States to China, the alternate universe would show the outcome if you decided to venture to Asia instead.
The idea is pervasive in comic books and movies. For example, in the 2009 "Star Trek" reboot, the premise is that the Kirk and Spock portrayed by Chris Pine and Zachary Quinto are in an alternate timeline apart from the William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy versions of the characters.
The concept is known as a "parallel universe," and is a facet of the astronomical theory of the multiverse. There actually is quite a bit of evidence out there for a multiverse. First, it is useful to understand how our universe is believed to have come to be.
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Arguing for a multiverse
Around 13.7 billion years ago, simply speaking, everything we know of in the cosmos was an infinitesimal singularity. Then, according to theBig Bang theory, some unknown trigger caused it to expand and inflate in three-dimensional space. As the immense energy of this initial expansion cooled, light began to shine through. Eventually, the small particles began to form into the larger pieces of matter we know today, such as galaxies, stars and planets.
The Dark Force
The Dark Force

One big question with this theory is: are we the only universe out there. With our current technology, we are limited to observations within this universe because the universe is curved and we are inside the fishbowl, unable to see the outside of it (if there is an outside.)
There are at least five theories why a multiverse is possible, as a 2012 Space.com article explained
1. We don't know what the shape of space-time is exactly. One prominent theory is that it is flat and goes on forever. This would present the possibility of many universes being out there. But with that topic in mind, it's possible that universes can start repeating themselves. That's because particles can only be put together in so many ways. More about that in a moment.
2. Another theory for multiple universes comes from "eternal inflation." Based on research from Tufts University cosmologist Alexander Vilenkin, when looking at space-time as a whole, some areas of space stop inflating like the Big Bang inflated our own universe. Others, however, will keep getting larger. So if we picture our own universe as a bubble, it is sitting in a network of bubble universes of space. What's interesting about this theory is the other universes could have very different laws of physics than our own, since they are not linked.
3. Or perhaps multiple universes can follow the theory of quantum mechanics (how subatomic particles behave), as part of the "daughter universe" theory. If you follow the laws of probability, it suggests that for every outcome that could come from one of your decisions, there would be a range of universes — each of which saw one outcome come to be. So in one universe, you took that job to China. In another, perhaps you were on your way and your plane landed somewhere different, and you decided to stay. And so on.
4. Another possible avenue is exploring mathematical universes, which, simply put, explain that the structure of mathematics may change depending in which universe you reside. "A mathematical structure is something that you can describe in a way that's completely independent of human baggage," said theory-proposer Max Tegmark of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, as quoted in the 2012 article. "I really believe that there is this universe out there that can exist independently of me that would continue to exist even if there were no humans."
5. And last but not least as the idea of parallel universes. To go back to the idea that space-time is flat, the number of possible particle configurations in multiple universes would be limited to 10^10^122 distinct possibilities, to be exact. So, with an infinite number of cosmic patches, the particle arrangements within them must repeat — infinitely many times over. This means there are infinitely many "parallel universes": cosmic patches exactly the same as ours (containing someone exactly like you), as well as patches that differ by just one particle's position, patches that differ by two particles' positions, and so on down to patches that are totally different from ours.
Arguing against a parallel universe
Not everyone agrees with the parallel universe theory, however. A 2015 article on Medium by astrophysicist Ethan Siegal agreed that space-time could go on forever in theory, but said that there are some limitations with that idea.
The key problem is the universe is just under 14 billion years old. So our universe's age itself is obviously not infinite, but a finite amount. This would (simply put) limit the number of possibilities for particles to rearrange themselves, and sadly make it less possible that your alternate self did get on that plane after all to see China.
Also, the expansion at the beginning of the universe took place exponentially because there was so much "energy inherent to space itself," he said. But over time, that inflation obviously slowed — those particles of matter created at the Big Bang are not continuing to expand, he pointed out. Among his conclusions: that means that multiverses would have different rates of inflation and different times (longer or shorter) for inflation. This decreases the possibilities of universes similar to our own.
"Even setting aside issues that there may be an infinite number of possible values for fundamental constants, particles and interactions, and even setting aside interpretation issues such as whether the many-worlds-interpretation actually describes our physical reality," Siegal said, "the fact of the matter is that the number of possible outcomes rises so quickly — so much faster than merely exponentially — that unless inflation has been occurring for a truly infinite amount of time, there are no parallel universes identical to this one."
But rather than seeing this lack of other universes as a limitation, Siegal instead takes the philosophy that it shows how important it is to celebrate being unique. He advises to make the choices that work for you, which "leave you with no regrets." That's because there are no other realities where the choices of your dream self play out; you, therefore, are the only person that can make those choices happen.