How to Approach a Girl: 10 Simple Tips

You know that nerve-wrecking and awkward situation when you’re walking behind a girl on the sidewalk…
And you’re wondering whether to…
1. Walk in front of her and pass her quickly. Or…
2. Walk really slow so she doesn’t think you’re following her.
Wouldn’t it be helpful if you knew exactly what to say and what to do?
It may sometimes feel like the “butterfly stomach” feeling you get on a rollercoaster ride.
Luckily, I am here to tell you that approaching a random girl isn’t as difficult as most guys make it seem.
In this post, I offer you 10 simple tips that will help you approach girls in public.
Feel free to browse through and pick a few that you can implement right away because…
Soon you will be charming girls on streets left and right at ease!
Sound good? Then let’s begin.
First up…
Tip 1: Take Action Immediately
Chances are, if you are starting out to approach women in public…
You will come across two obstacles…
1. Approach Anxiety
2. Lag-time
Approach anxiety is pretty self explanatory. But it’s basically the fear of approaching a girl you find attractive.
Lag-time is the time from the moment you see her, up until when you take action.
It’s important to reduce lag-time because…
If you can’t get this step down, getting her number and going on a date with her is completely out of the realm of possibilities.
Because of approach anxiety and lag-time…
1. Your brain will come up with a million excuses on why you shouldn’t talk to her.
2. Your brain will then start to overthink things so when you finally do the approach, you freeze up. Thus, not being your true self.
The first part in solving this is by simply acknowledging it.
Acknowledge that you being a little bit nervous in this situation is completely normal…
And then immediately afterwards, take action steps.
My favorite two exercises I like to do in order to get the momentum rolling are:
1. Giving compliments to strangers.
2. Clapping out loud.
By giving compliments to strangers, it gets your tongue rolling. You begin to feel more comfortable speaking.
By clapping out loud, you will realize that people will look at you, and continue on their days.
The biggest fear from guys is that they are afraid that people will judge them. They give too many f*cks on what other people think.
Sometimes, people will even clap with you!
Next up…
Tip 2: Assume Attraction
Having a positive mindset is what separates the guys that end up succeeding with women and don’t.
If you have in your mind…
Please don’t reject me…
Chances are, you won’t project the same vibe compared to if you are thinking…
I’m the prize. All girls love to talk to me.
So many guys get blinded by a girl’s beauty…
And end up forgetting about their own worth and value.
Assuming attraction is talking to the girl as if she already likes you without trying to convince her to like you more.
You have to ask yourself questions like…
My life is already awesome. What reason would this girl have to not like me?
• If she stays and talks with you = assume she is interested
• If she leaves and tells you to fuck off = assume she is not interested
Go up to her, assume she is madly in love with you and if she isn’t down for you, then you move on to the next girl.
Simple as that…
Up next…
Tip 3: Get Her Attention As Early As Possible
So now that you conquered your irrational fears…
You decide to walk up to that cute girl…
And you are offered the “cold-shoulder” and signs of disinterest…
You need to realize that… Since girls are sometimes in motion and are going to a specific location…
It can be really confusing on how to approach these situations but I’m here to tell you:
That there is a specific way to do it.
There are mainly 3 types of setsyou will commonly run into…
• Walking Sets
• Sitting Sets
• In group Sets
You are letting her know that you have shit going on in your life.
If they are walking on the streets…
You need to decide whether you want to “hard stop her”, or “walk with her”.
Personally, I’ve stopped girls, interacted with them, and made them completely forget about their agenda.
And also, I’ve walked with girls and have changed their set plans to grab a drink with me at Starbucks.
Up next…
Tip 4: Don’t Get Obsessed With Openers
So you’ve finally made the approach. Now it’s time for the opener…
The words that come out of your mouth.
This is the step that guys heavily focus on… that is until they are told…
That it really doesn’t matter.
Here’s why:
• Women respond more to your actions than your words.
• Sub-communication and body-language is everything.
There are times I go indirect, and times where I go direct.
My go to opener is:
Excuse me, I know this is random, but I thought you looked fun so I thought I’d say hi, or else I’d regret it for the next 36 seconds!
This is a great opener because…
1. You are showing that you are polite by saying “excuse me”.
2. You are being forward and stating intentions.
3. You are being genuine and honest.
But again, forget about openers. Focus on being genuine and good things will happen.
Next up…
Tip 5: Be Clear in Your Intent
What does it mean to be clear in your intent?
1. Be clear in your thoughts, words, and actions.
2. Don’t beat-around the bush.
You are a man.
If you see a girl you find attractive, you must be 100% certain she knows you are interested in being more than just friends.
Girls will appreciate you for that.
The biggest problem that guys make is that they beat around the bush and hope that the girl will magically see them as a sex worthy male.
Nothing is more attractive to a girl than a guy who is on his purpose and knows exactly what he wants and executes upon it.
I used to go around trying to hit on girls without being clear in my intentions. Girls aren’t stupid. They know you are trying to flirt with them.
As soon as I began to show my intent early on the interaction, great things started to happen.
Next up…
Tip 6: Decide Whether To Stop Her Or Continue Walking
Some say that walking with girls…
Have a higher conversion rate of opens to positive because…
You are getting more time investment.
While some say, it’s needy behavior to walk in the same direction the girl is going.
My personal take is this…
It all depends on the situation. Sometimes you stop them, sometimes you walk with them. Be willing to adapt.
Now… since the girls will either be walking towards you or walking away from you.
If you decide to “walk with” the girl. Just know that…
1. This works great because she is already heading somewhere and you aren’t an obstacle in her eyes.
2. You have to constantly throw out topics/stuff to say to give her a taste of who you are.
If you decide to “hard stop” the girl. Just know that…
1. This is a high risk, high reward option.
2. You can follow up with a direct opener.
3. Women will respect you for your directness and confidence.
4. You might come off as a promoter, or someone that is trying to sell them something.
How do you stop a girl that is walking away from you?
• As soon as you spot her across the street, immediately run after her and…
• About 5 steps away, say “excuse me” as you tap her on the shoulder.
• After you get her attention, you can tell her you literally ran all the way there to say “hello”.
You can choose whether you want to get in front of her or walk a long but I recommend going in front of her.
This will get the momentum rolling and will prevent you from turning back.
Do not walk.
Try out both. And see which one you like. I can guarantee you that you will encounter good sets with both methods.
Next up…
Tip 7: If She Is Sitting, Sit the F*ck down too!
A lot of times, guys make the mistake of awkwardly standing up while talking to girl that is looking up…
Staring at his crotch.
If they are sitting down, you have a great advantage.
• Notice if there is any available seats next to her…
• Talk with her for a couple of minutes…
• Tell her you have to go in a few minutes but thought she was cute so you wanted to say “hi” as you take a seat down next to her…
By telling her you have to go in a few minutes, you are reducing the amount of pressure of the situation.
This is crucial. Tell her that you are about to
Next up…
Tip 8: Take the Pressure Off of Her
Chances are, if you are approaching girls in public…
Some of them will be tensed because they don’t know if you are a cool guy or not.
Because of that, their defenses are naturally up.
There’s a jargon term in the pickup community called false time constraints, and it’s great to use because…
It’s a great way to take the pressure off of the girl because she knows if she doesn’t like you, you’ll be gone soon.
Hey. I’ve got to get back to my friends, but before I go, I just thought you were really cute and want to say hello.
See what I did there?
This is also great if you are approaching a girl sitting down.
Let’s say she is sitting down eating at a food court.
Approach her, and right as you are about to sit down say…
Hey, I’ll sit for a minute or so because I have to order food… but I wanted your opinion. Should I get pizza or sushi?
By you using false time constraints in your interactions, it allows the girl to relax a bit more and she will be more likely to express herself more comfortably.
Next tip…
Tip 9: Use Statements of Empathy
You need to imagine yourself in the girl’s position…
• She might think you are trying to sell her something.
• She might think it was a dare from your friends.
Imagine a random stranger rolled up to you and started chatting you up.
You might be a bit tensed up at first.
My best advice is to have empathy in your approach.
If you stop her from behind and she freaks out…
Oh sorry, I did not mean to startle you. Anyways, your cute…
Empathy is the ability to sense another girl’s emotions and allow it to effect yours.
You need to understand the simple fact that a handful of girls you approach on the streets…
Are in a rush to go to somewhere… whether it is…
• Work
• School
• Shopping
• Or… running errands
Treat them like humans. Acknowledge that they are in a hurry.
I’ve seen so many guys blindly ignore the fact and it usually leads them to being rejected..
And them wondering if it was what they said but really it’s a lack of being self aware.
Next up…
Tip 10: Avoid Interview Mode
You ask her old she is, she answers with a number…
You ask her where she is from, she answers with a word…
You ask her what ethnicity she is, she answers…
What’s the problem?
She feels interrogated and it doesn’t give her an opportunity to invest in you.
Here’s how to avoid the mistake that most guys make…
• Instead of asking questions, turn them into statements.
• Instead of asking her where she is from, guess where she is from.
• This not only triggers a “What makes you think that!?” response, but it makes the conversation 10x more interesting.
Anyways, that is all.
I hope you enjoyed these 10 simple tips.
Now go out there and start implementing these tips because…
Reading and learning is one thing, it’s another to actually take action

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